Leave it to Beaver

[bach2yoga]

Gotta love these critters!!!! :bounce:


KNOWLTON TWP SURRENDERS TO BEAVERS

Date: 2 Apr 2003
From: "Peter Montague" {Peter@rachel.org}

Associated Press, March 31, 2003

Knowlton Township - Beaver dams have caused flooding on town property
and blocked fire hydrant pipes for years, but officials say they're
done trying to outsmart the critters.

Instead the town will celebrate the beavers that haven't been
deterred by having their dams knocked down, or by the earthen berms
and pipes that were put in to stop them.

Township Mayor Frank Van Horn said he has designated June 21 as
Knowlton Township Beaver Day. The beaver also has been declared the
township's official animal.

"Whereas, neither Department of Public Works director, nor engineer,
nor game warden, nor mayor has been able to outsmart the mighty
beavers of Knowlton Township," the official resolution said.

"We figured we couldn't win," Van Horn said. "Even the State of New
Jersey said we've got some of the smartest beavers in the world."

When township workers remove dams to prevent flooding, the structures
are quickly rebuilt by the beavers. Pipes put in to prevent clogs
caused by dams are covered right up by the animals.

"They've probably been to some Ivy League school," Van Horn said.
"They beat us all the time."

 

[JeffD]

I wonder what the Beaver's teacher would say!

While the allies are taking down Sadam and his Bath party in Iraq, in New Jersey officials have surrendered to Beavers. I wonder, if the next time the fire department needs the hydrants to fight a fire, it will be able to use them. In a case where human welfare and the workings of ingeneous animals conflict, it seems like the humans will be trumped by the animals rights. I couldn't imagine that township even considering killing or at least tranquillizing and removing the animals when their rights conflict with that of humans. Only in New Jersey. :?

 

[Ben Ruset]

It's easier to give up then spend taxpayer $ to have them "removed" and then deal with the fallout from PETA, etc.

From the sound of the article it seems like the problem is only one one piece of township property, so it's not really a problem of epic proportions. There comes a time when it comes too costly or troublesome to change nature and you have to yield.

I thought beavers didn't like being near civilization. They should have just put up scarecrows or something.

 

[JeffD]

Yeah, Ben, they should have done something. That's right, beavers don't like being near civilization. Maybe the fire department should just stop by occasionally, blow their sirens and horns, have a few beers, get loud, so the beavers will move out.

I don't know, it seems to me that not being able to hook up to a fire hydrant to get water to put out a fire is enough of a problem to have to solve it. Who cares about the fallout from PETA. It's the principal of the thing too (that's assuming the problem is bad enough to warrant steps to solve it). You give groups like PETA an inch and they'll take a mile.

I experienced confrontations with PETA-like characters this past summer. It was one of the cooler days last summer, when the temperature was only about 80 degrees. I left our dog in the car for about 15 minutes, with the windows partially rolled down. On one occasion, it was dark. As my daughter, Lisa, and I approached my car, a woman was milling around. She expressed her concern about the dog, after which I assured her Dolly was alright. She began to lecture us, then I told her off and told her to mind her own business. She threatend to call the police. On other occasion, when it was light out, there was a group of people milling around my car. One of the busybodies began to look inside my car. I think it was on this occasion that Lisa got to the car ahead of me, and a woman started giving Lisa a hard time. No shrinking violet, Lisa argued with her. As I did on the other occasion, I told the busybody off. I asked her if didn't have a husband at home to nag and asked her if she was a member of PETA. As I left, I saw a man on a cell phone, while holding a baby in the hot sun. What hypocracy! If anything, I should call the police on him.

Shortly after I got home, a police office stopped by. He was pretty cool about it. He remarked that I could guess why he's here. I told him that some crazy busybodies were harrassing us about leaving the dog in the car for a short time. He laughed when I told him I asked the busybody if she was a member of PETA. I offered to let him see Dolly, to show him that the dog was fine. He said that that's all he needs and quipped "and I'll be a happy camper". I called Dolly, and she ran up to the officer to greet him. I wanted to charge the party that called him with a frivilous call to police, as the police have better things to do than answer calls from crackpots, but the officer didn't want to pursue it. The officer went away a happy camper. I think he may have been one of the cops who posted on the bulletin board run for and by local yokels. Most of the local cops hate the mayor et al, who has been trying to corrupt the force, using it for his own dastardly purposes. Many of the cops, who post under a pseudonym, would know my name from the board.

 

[bobpbx]

Jeff,

No wonder your dog is so small. Extreme heat and distress stunts their growth.

 

[JeffD]

Yeah, that's right Bob. Fifteen minutes in a car keeps a dog slim and small. It has nothing to do with the breed. Maybe Ed should put his dog in a warm car for fifteen minutes in the summer with the window open. That way he'll save space. That sounds like your brand of science.

 

[Ben Ruset]

I think he was alluding to the fact that the dog has spent her life near a source of hot air...

*ducks and runs*

 

[bobpbx]

Priceless, Ben, priceless!

Actually, with good wise management practices, and a healthy haircut once in awhile Dolly should live to a ripe old age. You see, we humans rule the earth and cultivate and nuture things for our benefit, not like the wacko Mac Greedy types that SPEW THEIR VENOM AND LIES, ALWAYS CAUSING ME HEARTBURN!

 

[JeffD]

Actually, Dolly does get a haircut once in awhile. She'll be getting one soon, IF IT EVER WARMS UP! Yeah, I know, she needs one regularly if she's around me.